Responsibility, Promises, and Angels

President Monson's talk about the 3 R's, "responsibility" really stuck out at me.  Several years ago, when I decided to own that word, I began to change my life!  Before that point, I had allowed myself to be "acted upon."  It was always something that caused my problems- not me!  I am depressed, therefore my depression is to blame.  That of course, is only one example out of the many.  I lived without accepting that I was the one in control of my destiny.

I relied heavily on others around me, until the day came that no one around me had the answers on where to turn after a heart-shattering experience.  Only the Savior could use the key of the atonement to unlock my prison cell, and pardon me with the peace I needed in my life to move forward.  It's interesting though, because I still remember the day that I was vacuuming down my basement stairs, at a time well before the life-altering experience, and I was contemplating how I could ever be more than I was; which in truth, I didn't figure amounted to much.

I wondered how people could have such strong testimonies, and undaunted spirits of faith and hope.  Little did I realize that in that moment the spirit was preparing my thoughts and helping shape my desires to become more than I had been to that point in my life.   President Monson says, "When faced with significant choices, how do we decide? Do we succumb to the promise of momentary pleasure? To our urges and passions? To the pressure of our peers?"

In the past I would have been more likely to do what was in my best interest, and thus act upon self-interests, and physical and emotional impulses. I have since decided, from the heartbreaking experiences of life, that the only way we can find peace and joy, is to first accept that the minutes and hours of our life go beyond ourselves and into the echoes of eternity.

There is not one single pleasure, passion, or pressure release valve, which will ever yield the joy and peace, which true disciples of Christ long for; except we give our whole soul to God, and walk circumspectly- looking through the lenses of self-sacrifice and self-discipline.  Indeed, our singular discipleship to God is the only path to a completely incomprehensible fulfillment of even more than we alone could have ever dreamed of in the moments of mortal passions, and appetites.

As we hold fast to the rod of iron, and wrestle through the unrelenting, and disorienting and blinding black smog of temptation, confusion, and doubt, we will ultimately reach the sweetest fruit that we could ever partake of.  The fruit, of the love of Christ. encompasses every righteous and holy passion and pleasure imaginable, and offers ten- fold the delight of any selfish, short-lived, and short-sighted appetites of the flesh.

President Monson continues, "Unlike Alice, we all know where we want to go, and it does matter which way we go, for by choosing our path, we choose our destination. Decisions are constantly before us. To make them wisely, courage is needed—the courage to say no, the courage to say yes. Decisions do determine destiny." I add that not only do our decisions determine our destiny, but our decisions also determine the destiny of those we love now, and those we have yet to love.  

I have been granted insights into the voices of angels, which remind me in sacred moment, that my life is bringing honor to them as I earnestly strive to correct the repercussions of the "blood and sins" of the present and previous generations of my family.  I do not quite understand it, but I feel, even as I write these words, the affirmation of the Spirit, and the present nearness of beloved angels, that my life is not as inconsequential as the cacophony of voices around me would lead me to believe.  With  heart pound, blood pumping pulsation, every part of my being adds to witness that my destiny is to lead my family (past, present, and future) toward spiritual victory- well beyond the weakness of the flesh.  

Today, I felt impressed to write a friend of mine, and express just a small portion of my concerns.  As I did so, the Spirit helped to soften my heart, and help me see my challenges for what they are in the scheme of eternity.  

My cleansing tears flowed freely, as my troubled mind was washed of the impurities of distorting doubts.  And, I had an experience as I wrote, which was very much like Alma (36:19), "I could remember my pains no more; yea, I was harrowed up by the memory of my sins no more."

Perhaps my experiences are unique to your own spiritual moments of assurance and direction from our loving Heavenly Father, but I assure you, the message of my experiences is the same for each one of you. For the Spirit bears witness to me that you are on your own unique journey home to our Heavenly Father.  You are on a quest to save not only yourself, but those you love.

As we are reminded in the "Disciple Leadership" video, your influence in the small and consistent ways, do cause  ripples upon the waters of life.  Do not underestimate the difference you are making.  I felt ready to give in to the voices of doubt. I felt ready to stop trying so hard to be meek in the face of adversity. I felt ready to act upon impulses to speak in my defense, against my "accusers.(John 8:10)  

Today, I did not succumb to the voices of worldly logic and worldly reason.  Instead, I followed through on that impression to write a friend of my experiences with doubt. In the process this quiet timing of writing introspection, I was able to listen to the loving logic of our Heavenly Father, who assures and guides us on individual journey's home.  

Indeed, you are placed here "for such a time as this (Esther 4:14)." While we each have unique strengths, capabilities, and circumstances, we can stand, wherever we are, united in the army of our God- if we are one in purpose of heart, mind, and hands.  

In an amazing BYU Devotional, by  Donald W. Parry "Angel, Chariots, and the Lord of Hosts."), Brother Parry shares some of the following:

"President Packer provided the following significant
 statement:

Angels attend the rank and file of the Church. . .
 .
Who would dare to say that angels do not now attend the rank and file of the
 Church who—answer the calls to the mission fields, teach the
 classes, pay their tithes and offerings, seek for the records of
 their forebears,
work in the temples, raise their children in
faith, and have brought this work through 150 years?""This statement of President Packer’s clearly shows that
 angels attend the Church’s rank and file as they raise children in faith, pay tithing, conduct
 sacred temple work, teach classes, and more." 
"It is my understanding—based on more than
 twenty years of research—that operations and ministrations of angels are largely unknown to mortals.
 Angels can move about the earth conducting the Lord’s divine work, and they serve, minister, and
 mingle among mortals, usually without our awareness. Most of us in mortality will never see an
 angel. As Parley P. Pratt instructed, angels can “be present without being visible to
 mortals.”15 And Paul wrote, “Be not forgetful to entertain strangers: for thereby some
 have entertained angels unawares” (Hebrews 13:2)."

=== end excerpt

I conclude with my united testimony of the words President Dieter F. Uchtdorf shared (https://www.lds.org/general-conference/2011/10/you-matter-to-him?lang=eng),

"...no matter where you live, no matter how humble your circumstances, how meager your employment, how limited your abilities, how ordinary your appearance, or how little your calling in the Church may appear to you, you are not invisible to your Heavenly Father. He loves you. He knows your humble heart and your acts of love and kindness. Together, they form a lasting testimony of your fidelity and faith.

Brothers and Sisters, not only are you encompassed about by angels, because of your efforts of righteousness, but you will also one day fully discover that you were ministering angels in your unselfish service the those within your influence.  

You may not understand you influence now, but one day every act of righteousness and responsibility you willingly took upon yourself, will be paid off in dividends.  Rest assured, that every sacrifice now, is worth it.  You and I must never underestimate our worth!  

"....We have the faithful promise of God that He will neither forget nor forsake those who incline their hearts to Him.²¹ Have hope and faith in that promise. Learn to love your Heavenly Father and become His disciple in word and in deed."

"Be assured that if you but hold on, believe in Him, and remain faithful in keeping the commandments, one day you will experience for yourselves the promises revealed to the Apostle Paul: “Eye hath not seen, nor ear heard, neither have entered into the heart of man, the things which God hath prepared for them that love him.”^22"

"Brothers and sisters, the most powerful Being in the universe is the Father of your spirit. He knows you. He loves you with a perfect love."

"God sees you not only as a mortal being on a small planet who lives for a brief season—He sees you as His child. He sees you as the being you are capable and designed to become. He wants you to know that you matter to Him."

"May we ever believe, trust, and align our lives so that we will understand our true eternal worth and potential. May we be worthy of the precious blessings our Heavenly Father has in store for us is my 
prayer in the name of His Son, even Jesus Christ, amen."

"For it is not ye that speak, but the Spirit of your Father which speaketh in you."

Today, I was asked to write about some things we've been learning in class.  After I finished, I decided that perhaps there could be of some benefit in sharing it here at my blog.  So, here I am!

Here is what I shared with my class:

Over the last few years, there has been a change in how I view people and the world. I have an increase of love for them, and I long for them to feel of the sweetness that I finally came to more fully comprehend.  My posts, blogs, and use of my time and efforts has consequently changed. My posts are read only by several people (no more than 60---though often much less!)

In truth, my words are not generally as popular as the latest recipe, funniest meme, or the coolest new trend, but I am hopeful that I am making a difference in helping to buoy up other Christians, and help other to know who God, and Jesus Christ are. 

I know it sounds like a stretch to think I could make a difference, but I hope I do.  It has not been uncommon over the years for only one person to say... "Christine, this is just what I needed to hear tonight.  Thank you."  I have had the peaceful feeling in my heart at special times, which witnesses by the Spirit of God, that my offering is accepted of Him. And I feel like I have made a difference, even though it is not accountable by me.

I read a talk today, and found these words by Russell M. Ballard, encouraging.

"While some conversations have audiences in the thousands or even millions, most are much, much smaller. But all conversations have an impact on those who participate in them.  Perceptions of the Church are established one conversation at a time.

"The challenge is that there are too many people participating in conversations about the Church, for our Church personnel to converse with and respond to individually. We cannot answer every question, satisfy every inquiry..some who seek answers want them to come directly from a member of the Church.  They appreciate one-on-one conversation."

“Sharing the Gospel Using the Internet,” by Elder M. Russell Ballard, Liahona, June 2008. 

I think that too many of us are afraid to speak up, for fear we are wrong, or we don't express ourselves well enough. I realize that some are better at written or verbal communication, but the spirit does NOT work on the premise of perfection.  

The Spirit relays himself on the wings of truth.  The Spirit speaks through the sincere and generous voice of all who seek to share God's love through the Spirit. People will feel that of us, if there is no pretense.  As Elder Ballard also shared, it is true that knowing, studying, and understanding gospel principals is an important key to sharing the gospel, BUT, I would also add that God can still use what we know, and what we testify of, as we speak in the Spirit of love, and truth.  

Story:
I learned this lesson about the Spirit, in an unusual, but very difficult way a few years ago, when I got up to perform a Christmas solo, "The Star of Bethlehem," in sacrament a couple years ago. I had performed a solo for the ward Christmas party just a few nights prior, and it had gone fairly well, though I was terribly nervous, and my voice was more vibrato as a result.  

However, when I went to stand up to sing in sacrament this Sunday, I felt perfectly at peace. I felt no worries. I felt confident that I could, for once in my life, sing without the nervousness that has always negatively affected my singing!  I felt so thankful and hopeful for a nearly flawless performance.  As I stepped to the mic, I said a silent prayer to ask Heavenly Father to help dedicate my song to Him, and for His good.

The piano began playing, and I confidently opened my mouth to sing, and the sounds that came out of my voice sounded like I had a cold!! I was thoroughly perplexed at what was going on.  Here I was singing for the Lord, and my voice would not cooperate.  I just kept silently praying and asking Heavenly Father to free the sound of my voice.  I had hope that it would soon appear.  I was able to clearly sing a few high notes, but immediately my voice clicked back into the sounding sick and weak.

(YOU CAN WATCH SOME NEWER VIDEOS OF ME SINGING, NEAR THE BOTTOM OF THIS POST. I went to class one night, and afterward discovered a very talented pianist and singer, and we became quick friends! The recordings aren't great, because the recording and sound don't match. So cover my mouth with your hand, and watch my eyes. :) 

Why I continued singing, is anyone's guess!  Well, really, I know why.  that song has tremendous spiritual meaning to me, about not giving up hope, because "my star (of His promise, is) still there." So, I did the best I could, to sing with my heart- where my voice did not cooperate.  

I was surprised to realize that as I was looking into the face of my friends and ward family, I could see love and tears in their eyes!  The Spirit relayed to me, in that moment, that His message is relayed even through imperfect vessels!  That was mind boggling to me, because I'd lived my entire life on the premise that I had to be talented or beautiful to be of worth.  And here was the Spirit teaching me, that my beauty is completely independent of worldly measuring systems of value!  

Despite that understanding, I finished my song, and then I plopped myself down on the seat near the podium, which I'd just sung at.  I sat directly behind my bishop and his counselors. I sunk low in the soft fold down seat, and covered my eyes with my hand, and I wept.  

I would have run out of the church, but there was no where to escape without full view of those 130-ish people.  As I sat there silently weeping, I kept silently pleading asking "Why? Why did you take my voice Heavenly Father? Why?" Because at that point, I KNEW God had removed my gift from me!  This was further confirmed when it came time to sing the closing song, "It Came Upon A Midnight Clear," and I composed myself enough to sing--- with a beautiful, clear voice!!  Yes, God had taken my voice- but why?!

It took me a few days, but the answers came.  Some are too sacred to share, but some may be of benefit to any of you (who manage to tackle "Wordy Word Girls" words!). Heavenly Father needed me to understand:

1.  My worth is NOT dependent upon my appearance or skills.  

2.  The Spirit can and does use our imperfect selves to relay His messages.

3.  My gifts ARE from God alone. He can take and He can give.  (I thought I understood that, but trust me, this lesson cinched that understanding of my perfect dependency upon the Savior's grace!)

Being humble is imperative to our spiritual success.  (And while I feel I approached that experience humbly, He apparently saw a need to teach me a truly empathetic lesson on the matter!)

Side note: You may also be interested to know that many of my ward members gathered around me in love, and shared how that had felt the Spirit.  Many said I sounded just like the Shepherd boy, who was seeking his star that night!

I just found this link at Youtube.  It's not me singing, but she has a beautiful voice.  And you too may be able to feel the spirit and message of this song! It's beautiful!

In conclusion, I want to share the sentiments of Be Not Afraid, Only Believe --Dieter F. Uchtdorf (This October 2015 session of General Conference.) These words had a strong impact upon my spirit, because I find that I doubt and second guess myself a LOT, especially on spiritual matters.

"Satan, our adversary, wants us to fail. He spreads lies as part of his effort to destroy our belief. He slyly suggests that the doubter, the skeptic, the cynic is sophisticated and intelligent, while those who have faith in God and His miracles are naive, blind, or brainwashed." 

"Satan will advocate that it is cool to doubt spiritual gifts and the teachings of true prophets."

"I wish I could help everyone to understand this one simple fact: we believe in God because of things we know with our heart and mind, not because of things we do not know. Our spiritual experiences are sometimes too sacred to explain in worldly terms, but that doesn’t mean they are not real."

If you live with diligence and consistence to be worthy of the Spirit (and selectively tune down the sounds and voices of world distractions), you will be able to hear and obey the sound of the Spirit voice.  

You won't always know you are on God's errand, but just as a clean vessel pours clean water, so you shall also pour out purified words from heaven, which will help, lift, bless,strengthen, and edify all those on your journey. 

It won't matter if your words are eloquent of simple, the Spirit will relay his message of truth and sincerity. "Ponder anew" upon Heavenly Fathers blessings. Continually draw your thoughts to remembrance of His goodness, and express frequent gratitude for your many blessings.

Step forth daily in the path of righteousness, and you will know that you too can made a small difference in the ripples of life.  For, indeed, you will be acting in His name, and as a true disciple of Christ.
In the name of Jesus Christ, amen.

Christine

P.S. I just found this wonderful scripture, which is very applicable to what I said!

Matthew 10: 10-22

16 ¶Behold, I send you forth as sheep in the midst of wolves: be ye therefore wise as For it is not ye that speak, but the Spirit of your Father which speaketh in you. serpents, and harmless as doves.

17 But beware of men: for they will deliver you up to the councils, and they will scourge you in their synagogues;

18 And ye shall be brought before governors and kings for my sake, for a testimony against them and the Gentiles.

19 But when they deliver you up, take no thought how or what ye shall speak: for it shall be given you in that same hour what ye shall speak. 

20 For it is not ye that speak, but the Spirit of your Father which speaketh in you.

22 And ye shall be hated of all men for my name’s sake:but he that endureth to the end shall be saved.

I'm sure, like me, you have been persecuted, mocked, and made fun of for you beliefs. (Well, if you are as vocal as I am!)  But I have found it to be true that God will help me to speak.  And, I have felt on precious occasion the witness that it is the Spirit of God, blessing me with word beyond my own capacity.

And yet, there are times I doubt myself.  I needed these reminders, so that I can move forward in faith. God goes before me, and I am in His care. Put your life in order, and be worthy of His Spirit, and He will bless you with the words, and wisdom like a "serpents" and humility "as a dove."  And no matter what fiery furnace you "endure" you will come through safely encompassed in His love!

MY RECORDINGS.  Not great, but better than the above video, I think.

I start singing at 1:03.  My friend H. starts out the song.  She's been playing since she was 4!  I don't know this song well...as evidenced .

Toward your "promised land!"

I was reading in 1 Nephi (in the Book of Mormon) asked myself, "Why did he bother to say that 'my
father dwelt in a tent?' What possible significance could there be?"

1 Nephi 2:15
Book of Mormon

"And my father dwelt in a tent."

I'm not a scriptorian, but to me this has taken on a special significance. I see the tent representing the quality of humility in Lehi.  (i.e. tent = humble)

Here's Lehi, a man of wealth and some prominence in his former community, and yet he is now at pretty much the worst possible position in life. Lehi,and his family are  no longer in a large estate, but in a tent.

Now maybe it's a tent of great beauty, color, and character... and there is some possibility of that in my mind- given that he was a man of wealth.  And yet, even if that were so, the tent represents to me that he is a man without a home to speak of.  Or, at very best, a man who is on a journey to somewhere of significance to him. (As I'm sure they owned tents for the same reason that we own RV's, camper trailers, or stay at a hotel- They used them for the means of traveling/moving.)

In modern times we do a lot of travel.  We journey to meet someone worth the effort, or to see something breathtaking (Like a beach! or the Swiss Alps), or to move and start a new life elsewhere.  Given the difficulties and dangers of journeys, which even the wealthy faced back then, I doubt many people travelled out of sheer entertainment, or adventure- like we do now.  They could not have flown, driven, or taken a luxury liner, which we can do in such ease and comfort, to visit friends and family, or to discover an exotic destination!

I just thought of this song: "Do you know where you're going to?
Do you like the things that life is showing you? 
Where are you going to? Do you know?"

I have heard this on rare occasion over the past few years, and until now, I didn't really understand what it was about, but I think I do now!  I think the Spirit of God is asking me...

Do you really understand where you are going to Christine?

Do you know what it's going to take to complete your own journey?

Do you know what you need when you get there?

Do you know what you must leave behind, so that you aren't more burdened down than you need to be?

Do you like the things that your journey has shown you so far? And if you don't, why not?  What reservations do you have about some of your "wilderness" experiences?"

Like Lehi, I am on a journey through my wilderness. Indeed, I am very much like Lehi, in that God has directed the course of my life into some very difficult, and in many ways- humbling circumstance. Circumstances in which it would have been easy to fight back like Laman or Lemuel, or complain as they did, but only if I was willing to lose God's precious care, direction, and blessings with the Holy Spirit.

My life, is filled with conditions and circumstances which most around me have little, if any comprehension, of why things have or are happening to me, which happened in the past, or which will yet happen.  And, try as others might to understand (for reasons of curiosity, judgement, or love), only God understands the full depth of my wearisome,and emotionally exhaustive journey through the desert of discipleship and experience.

And yet, while I myself understand, just a very small portion of why my "journey" toward my "promised land" has to be as difficult, and humbling as it has been, God assures me he will bring me safely there!  No matter what befalls me.

.... Oh wait, here comes a new song to my thoughts... (CLICK ON THE SONG Words to OPEN  new link tab, with the Youtube video. :)

"How can I hope to make you understand, 
why I do, what I do?  
Why I must travel to a distant land, 
Far from the home I love."
Once I was happily content to be
As I was, where I was, 
Close to the people who are close to me, 
Here in the home I love."
(Fiddler on the Roof)

How applicable this song is!  Indeed, like the song says, love does lead me forward.  Just as Lehi was driven forward in love! If it were't love that led Lehi on, he would not have given up all that he owned. He would not have sacrifices the comforts he knew, nor accepted the persecution, hostility, and resentment of his sons (and at times,even his wife).

I contend, that just like Lehi, I to am driven forth in my decisions toward a new "home." I am driven forward by love, hope. I am encouraged forward with the assurances of a brighter, "far better land of promise, beyond this veil oft tears." Alma 37:45 The hardships, Lehi faced are swallowed up in his desire to follow God.  Lehi is willing to give everything to Heavenly Father, because he knows that there is more beauty, joy, and peace in His care- than to be found without his guidance.

Lehi, is a prophet living in a tent, accepting his life without murmering, angry, and short-sided views of life.  Even at the worst of life, we never hear Lehi say, "I can't do this. I'm turning back."  No, Lehi has a vision (both literal and figurative). He understands that his destiny, and the destiny of his family, and so many others, depends on his ability to follow through with his duty to God- despite the heart aches, sorrows, longings, and challenges of all he must endure.

Ah the sweet music of heavenly messages! "I've got a name, I've got a name. (Jim Croce)"  Yes, Indeed! Lehi does have a name.  This name is etched upon Lehi's heart, and is defined well beyond the integrity and virtue of his own name.  Lehi's name takes on something of an indescribable and harmonious coupling of song, for  we understand that it is the Saviors name etched upon his heart!


Lehi honors the Savior by his undaunted efforts of discipleship and faith, amidst the obstacles of tremendous adversity and worldly efforts to humiliate him.  His vision, though limited, allows Lehi to see that there is a lot more to life, than shallow attachment to "gold, silver, and precious things," which will only rust, and decay in time.

Lehi's heart valued righteousness, and he sought to always hear and hearken to the will of God.  With the spiritual gift of faith he vanquishes his fears. With diligent discipleship he observes to walk carefully in paths of righteousness.  I hope that someday, it may be said of me that I was a woman of Lehi-like vision and love of the Lord.  For I do love Him!

I pray  for the courage to travel through my own personal wilderness-even if that means I have to humbly and meekly crawl through moments of my personal deserts of desolation, will reflect my willingness to remain diligent, and persevere to endure my "wilderness", no matter what the cost!   For God's promised blessings are always worth it!

Don't give up your dreams of your promised land.  Don't let other persuade you to take "any dream," beside the one you really want! No! "any dream will (NOT) do!" Dream with the direction of God! Dream BIG! Don't lose sight of your dreams...of your "promised land!"

Keep on believing! Keep on hoping!

Your promised land, is worth any sacrifice!

Christine




P.S.  For those of you interested in other symbols I have discovered (at least they are applicable to me, though I'm sure others may find other ways to apply the scriptures to their own lives.) , I will paste a few of my insights (in bold) below.

Chapter 1:
 4 And it came to pass that he departed into thewilderness. And he left his house, and the land of his inheritance, and his gold, and his silver, and his preciousthings, and took nothing with him, save it were his family,

and provisions, and tents, and a departed into thewilderness.

I need to take great care in what literal and figurative things I take with me to my promised land! The journey will be rough, and I don't need any extra burdens.

Chapter 2:

 5 And he came down by the borders near the shore of theaRed Sea; and he traveled in the wilderness in the borders which are nearer the Red Sea; and he did travel in the wilderness with his family, 

To get to the promised land we must first travel through the wilderness. We are strengthened through the wilderness, and we have more gratitude for the promised land after having experiences so much hardship! I look forward to my promised land, which is overflowing with milk and honey!

6 And it came to pass that when he had traveled three days in the 

wilderness, he pitched his tent in a avalley by the side of a briver of water.

7 And it came to pass that he built an aaltar of bstones, and made an coffering unto the Lord, and gave dthanks untothe Lord our God.

I consider that, as with modern camping, they had to clear the area they wanted to live- thus removing debris, rocks, and soothing terrain. It was only until the tent was pitched, and land prepared, that Lehi made an altar to the Lord. (I define how I see this near the bottom of this blog. :)

I dissect this scripture to mean that I need to put my life in order, so that I can more carefully and more capably pursue the things of God. To me the preparing, and putting our lives in order, represents that we are willing to remove (literal/figurative sins and burdens), as we clean and purify our lives and develop a sturdy Christ-centered foundation of faith.

I think of the tent as our homes. (Tent=Home) And interchangeably I speak of my literal home that I live in, or the home of my spirit and my physical human body (my soul = body + spirit). Either way, the thought of "home" represents the need for a solid foundation. Without a solid foundation of the basic needs being met in either areas of home, it is very hard for anyone to really reach their higher potential- especially as it relates to things of God..

Stability yields spirituality. (I think I may have coined a new phrase! I haven't thought that concept through carefully, but currently it makes sense! I hope it will to you as well. :) I can't help but compare MY(?) phrase above- to our lives. It is only until we have prepared our homes and souls that we can effectively give and receive the abundance of life, which is available.  

Can we build our altars of sacrifice before the Lord, in good conscious? 

Did we do the best we could?  Or did we withhold anything?  

And, just as with the altars in the temples of the Lord, can we dedicate our home and souls to be dedicated temples to the Lord? 

I hope that we each work very hard to succeed at dedicating every area of our lives to God. When we have prepared and done our best to place all we have and are before Heavenly Father, he will give us so much more in return! 

Side Note: In story form this concept of being prepares is like saying that the mayor of your community (or someone you respect, admire, and look up to.) comes to your door unexpectedly, and asks if he can come and visit with you. 

Would you feel comfortable having him see your home in a very messy or filthy condition? 

Or would you favor that type of discomfort, embarrassment, or shame, by welcoming the mayor (or,Your Mother in law! ;) into to a clean, well cared for home? 

Our home and souls are like this too- we either feel comfortable, or embarrassed of what we have to present.  Do we feel embarrassed of who we are? Or are we happy with who we are? 

Heavenly Father does love us perfectly. He love us, flaws and all. But wouldn't it please our loving Father in Heaven to see that we are trying to make His special gift - our lives- the very best they can be?! By taking care of God's gift, we are like a thankful child, who shows love and honor to a gift giver- by treating the gift with precious care and concern?

Heavenly Father should be the most respected company of our lives and souls, and it is imperative, for our own personal happiness and peace of mind, that we make needed changes to be able to welcome him with open arms--instead of trying to hide from him in a dark corner.

I know that some of you, who seek out, or stumble across this blog, feel so overwhelmed and confused in life. You don't know where to begin, or even know if it's worth the effort. I promise, I've been there. :(  It was a very dark time.

I guess I'd first, begin by PRAYING.  You don't need to say anything fancy.  

• Just PRAY for God's direction. 
• Pray that someone will come into your life, that can show you where to start. 
• Pray with all the desire and sincerity of your heart to know God. 

Heavenly Father will teach you, if you listen and follow the help he places before you. 

(And I'll always be glad to give you any direction I can . Just drop me an email, or leave a comment.) 

*I'd also say that if you are clinically depressed, or have other types of issues, that you seek professional counseling. There is no shame in getting the help you need- be it for a broken arm or depression!
Heavenly Father loves you. You can change! You can begin anew! Through the power of the Savior's atonement, you can find hope and healing. Let today begin your journey of healing through Christ.

For answers to your questions- please go to www.mormon.org. There are people there to do live chats with you, and help you find direction.

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A note about Altars. Defined in the dictionary (per Merriam-Webster dictionary)

Full Definition of ALTAR 

1 : a usually raised structure or place on which sacrifices are offered or incense is burned in worship —often used figuratively to describe a thing given great or undue precedence or value especially at the cost of something else <sacrificed his family life on the altar of career advancement>

2: a table on which the eucharistic elements are consecrated or which serves as a center of worship or ritual

To me, Altars are figuratively built from the gifts we are willing to give Him, as well as the sacrifices we give up in donating the rough terrain of our lives (represented by rocks [and maybe some sticks!] ;) . Without unnecessary obstacles in our path, we can better know the only true and living God, and thus experience the peace, joy, and comfort which can only be found through Jesus Christ! I love Him! 

Neal A. Maxwell said something similar to what I am trying to say; (though it is a slightly different comparison) of sacrifice and altars. 

"Though heavy, discipleship's burden can be made light (see Matt. 11:30). The Lord can 'ease the burdens,' and/or our shoulders can be made strong enough that we 'may be able to bear it' (Mosiah 24:14; 1 Cor. 10:13).

"So it is that real, personal sacrifice never was placing an animal on the altar. Instead, it is a willingness to put the animal in us upon the altar and letting it be consumed! Such is the 'sacrifice unto the Lord … of a broken heart and a contrite spirit,' (D&C 59:8), a prerequisite to taking up the cross, while giving 'away all [our] sins' in order to 'know God' (Alma 22:18) for the denial of self precedes the full acceptance of Him."

- Neal A. Maxwell, "Deny Yourselves of All Ungodliness," Ensign, May 1995, pp. 66-68 

Click here to read the full talk

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