Good Things To Come

I went to visit a troubled friend last night. (I will protect her privacy by calling her Mary.)  Armed with pizza and treats, and especially with a lot of silent prayer, I stepped out of my van.  I was unsure of what we would  talk about or how things would go.  I rang the doorbell with trepidation, but felt gentle assurance that the Lord would bless me.   As I tried to gauge her response to my visit I felt pleased to see her smile "hi" at me.

You see, Mary has been in a state of despair and hopelessness for a long time.  She has made unsuccessful attempts to take her life, and she feels no reason for living.  She questions her worth, and her faith in God.  She feels little, if any, hope for her future.

Initially our visit did not take shape as I had hoped, because one by one two of her sons, and then her husband trickled through the front room where we were visiting.  As the room gradually emptied and quietly settled, I had a thought to have her watch with me, a video I'd emailed her earlier, but she hadn't made time to watch.  (On her days off from work, Mary would rather play online games to pass away the emotionally painful and ticking hours of life.  I think it's her escape.)

As the video began her 11 year old son, and his friend, became interested in watching the video too.  They sat oddly enthralled by slow (by today's standards "faster" imagery) mini-video.  Mary and the boys were very quiet as they watched.  The spirit of the Lord seemed to fill the room, especially as a man of God spoke words with heartfelt emotion the words:

“Don’t give up, boy. Don’t you  quit. You keep walking. You keep trying. There is help and happiness ahead—a lot of it—.... You keep your chin up. It will be all right in the end. Trust God and believe in good things to come."

"I testify that God lives, that He is our Eternal Father, that He loves each of us with a love divine. I testify that Jesus Christ is His Only Begotten Son in the flesh and, having triumphed in this world, is an heir of eternity, a joint-heir with God, and now stands on the right hand of His Father. ....Some blessings come soon, some come late, and some don’t come until heaven; but for those who embrace the gospel of Jesus Christ, they come.  Of that I personally attest. I thank my Father in Heaven for His goodness- past, present, and future, and I do so in the name of His Beloved Son and most generous high priest, even the Lord Jesus Christ, amen."

After subtly seeing the boys off to play out front for a few minutes, I asked Mary what she thought about the video.  She is reserved with her feelings, so she just said "it was really nice."    I asked, "How did it make you feel."  Mary replied, "Oh, I don't know."  I asked, "Did it make you feel loved, of value, and special--and like you could indeed make it through this?"  She acknowledged it had, but added, "But it's really hard, Christine.  It's easier to just not try."  

With soberness I said, "Mary, you know I've been there before.  I've been there hanging over the cliff (literally) and considering ending my life.  I've been there hanging out the car door questioning if there was any value to my life.  I know what it means to feel hopeless."    

I proceeded to tell Mary about an experience of distress that I had recently and how I heard these simple, yet profound words in my thoughts:  "This too shall pass."  Added to that scripture memories and thoughts rushed into my mind of how these moments and experiences are fleeting.  

I recalled how I'd made it through some really dark hours. Hours that never seemed could improve.  Be it complete poverty, abuse, or the anguish of death,  my feelings seemed hopeless--like they would never end.  And yet they do end--some later than sooner.  

I asked her another question, but again she had little to say.   I added my thoughts,
"You know what struck me the first time tonight, as I watched that with you?  It was when the man says to the Dad that he and his wife and children would make the journey, but they wouldn't be making it in that car.  

I'd never considered the importance (and symbolism) of the vehicles that we travel in. The vehicle they were using would never get them to the destination they wanted to arrive at.   Sometimes we have to repair our vehicles or, for our safety, and well being switch to one that works properly."

With complete love, acceptance, and gentleness, I then carefully expressed a concern I have that she refuses to pray to our Heavenly Father, and manage her life without Him.  "Mary, Heavenly Father loves you more than anyone on earth.   He created you and He wants to help you, but you need to look to Him for that help.  

So that Mary didn't feel badly, I pointed out one of the serious repairs I am working to make on the symbolic vehicle that I want to return home to Heaven in.  I wanted her to know that I wasn't judging her.  I wanted her to know that we all have things we work on, but that with hard work things can be repaired.  

Before I left I suggested we start our daily walks again, and she said she would.  (She hasn't walked with me for a couple of weeks now, because she didn't feel like it anymore.) I am hopeful that taking up walking again will bless both of us to get out of our houses, have pleasant conversation, and breath in the fresh autumn air, and most of all, to find hope and healing through friendship. 

Mary stood up when I went to leave, and I gave her a hug and told her I love her.  She replied in kind.  I felt the warm, comforting spirit of God.  I know of His love and His hopes for her and her family.   I also felt that she took comfort and hope from my words of encouragement.

As I stepped with a smile into the chilly night air, I felt humbly grateful to have been on an errand of the Lord.  I felt grateful to know that as imperfect and insignificant as I am in this world, that there are a few people who need me.  I felt thankful that he has blessed me with His courage to do things, which in the past I would have unlikely attempted.  

I am thankful to be here in my body.  So very thankful that I didn't add anymore anguish into the world, and the hearts of those who love me or need me, by cutting my life short.  I am needed in this world, even in my small ways.  And so are you!!

I feel so thankful that I am learning of a joy that I never knew existed.  A joy that can only come when we are busy in the work of the Lord.  I am thankful that precious drop-by-drop, I am learning more about my value in God's eyes.  God's love is miraculous. 

You, my reader, may wonder how life could hold anything worthwhile.  Or, you may wonder how a certain challenge(s) that exists in your life, will find resolve.   I assure you,  as the darkness of evening falls upon our frail earthly hours, so to does the sun rise again.  If you hold out hope, and look to God, you will find answers to your problems, and a way through your darkest nights.  

With God's help you will one day see that the darkness of
frightening and uncertain storm clouds have parted, and
 in it's place the sunshine, and a dawning of a new day  rising.

Deuteronomy 31:6

Be strong and of a good courage, fear not, nor be afraid of them: for the Lord thy God, he it is that doth go with thee; he will not fail thee, nor forsake thee.

http://www.lds.org/scriptures/ot/deut/31.6?lang=eng#5


I hope you find hope of good things to come through the grace of Jesus Christ! 

Warmest Regards, Christine
For hope and direction please check out my two favorite websites:
www.mormon.org  and  www.lds.org

If you live in the U.S.A. and you need to talk to someone please call NOW.  Don't Wait!

My bad side...

Last night I took a profile picture of myself, to submit for consideration in a short film segment. As I uploaded the photo and saw what the camera and the world must see me like, I felt intensely ugly and discouraged.   I thought to myself, "I know I have a double chin, but was it so obvious?!"  (There were also MANY other negative thoughts I had about my appearance and inabilities, which I won't share.  Those thoughts caused me to feel I didn't measure up in any way.) I felt great disgust for myself, as I rolled my chubby body into bed.  I prayed the Lord would remove those feelings from me.  Which gratefully he did.  By morning I felt acceptance for myself--only with his help!
(My husband just read my blog, and says he doesn't understand why I felt like I did.  He just doesn't see those things when he looks at the picture.  That's the thing thing about all of this:
 My feelings don't become real, just because they feel real to me.)

The Edeweiss flower represents to me just a small portion of
God's glory here on earth.  If he took such tender care in
creating a soft, white, artistic flower like this, then what efforts
and thought must he have taken towards our creation. We are far
more beautiful than any of his other creations!

Perhaps others of you are just as hard on yourself.   Thoughts of ugliness are not from God, but from the devil.

Our kind, loving Heavenly Father sees us far differently than we see ourselves.
God does not have that same standard of beauty that the world depicts in movies and magazines.  Those are lies, and not reality.   Our Heavenly Father looks upon our hearts. He loves us with all the pure and tender feelings of the greatest parent we have ever known--and even then so much more than we can imagine.  He sees the radiance and glory of our spirits, desires, and actions.

I want to apologize here, because I realize that things aren't too bad for me.  I could be a much heavier person, my body or face could be disfigured, I could be missing teeth, etc.  Some of you who read this may have just those very challenges, and many others.   Far worse, or more painful than mine.  You may look at me and read my feelings and think with discouragement, "What is she complaining about.  If she thinks that's a bad picture, then what must I look like?"  I'm sincerely sorry.  It is not my wish to weigh you down, or make you feel badly about yourself.  It's a strange phenomenon, because I NEVER look at other people and have negative thoughts about their appearance.  I only feel that way about myself. :(  In fact, if I see someone, who looks like they are struggling, I say a fervent and silent prayer for them.  It's just harder for me to have the same generosity for myself? It's good to remember this "...we are ... hard on ourselves! Believe me when I say each of us is much better than we think. We need to recognize and celebrate what we’re doing right." (Bonnie D. Parken, Sweet Moments, complete article found here.)

Reach out to know and learn more of Jesus Christ.  His love
can heal you of any pain, heartache, anguish, or fear that you have.

"The Lord doesn’t care at all if we spend our days working in marble halls or stable stalls. He knows where we are, no matter how humble our circumstances. He will use—in His own way and for His holy purposes—those who incline their hearts to Him."

"God knows that some of the greatest souls who have ever lived are those who will never appear in the chronicles of history. They are the blessed, humble souls who emulate the Savior’s example and spend the days of their lives doing good" You Matter To Him 

It is very damaging when we start comparing ourselves to others. 

Fighting the invisible enemy of imagination

I've been there in that boxing ring of distress, far too often.  I stand alone and try punching at an invisible, but powerful enemy--my imagination.  I falsely believe that because someone is better than me, that somehow it lessens my value.  That's a lie!

I like to remind myself that "There is always going to be someone prettier, smarter, thinner (more athletic, talented, _______ (insert your own word),"  and it doesn't matter, because I can only be my best self.  My life here on earth isn't a competition against others, but a quest to become the very best person that I can be, within my allotted circumstances. That reminder has often brought me comfort. I'm going to start praying for help to love myself more, and ask that Heavenly Father will help me understand my intrinsic value.  I'm going to pray that I can learn from the examples of those I admire, but not feel overwhelmed by feelings of insignificance.  Perhaps you'd benefit from this prayer too. :) 

Take hope in knowing you are somebody special, even in those moments that, like me, you forget that.  Even if you do not look the way you wish you could.  Or, you have very real limitations and obstacles that make it difficult to do the things you want to in this world.  Someday, after the trials and hardships of this life, you will soar with joy and freedom through glorious courts on high. 
   "...no matter where you live, no matter how humble your circumstances, how meager your employment, how limited your abilities, how ordinary your appearance, or how little your calling in the Church may appear to you, you are not invisible to your Heavenly Father. He loves you. He knows your humble heart and your acts of love and kindness. Together, they form a lasting testimony of your fidelity and faith.

"....please understand that what you see and experience now is not what forever will be. You will not feel loneliness, sorrow, pain, or discouragement forever. We have the faithful promise of God that He will neither forget nor forsake those who incline their hearts to Him. Have hope and faith in that promise. Learn to love your Heavenly Father and become His disciple in word and in deed.

Be assured that if you but hold on, believe in Him, and remain faithful in keeping the commandments, one day you will experience for yourselves the promises revealed to the Apostle Paul: “Eye hath not seen, nor ear heard, neither have entered into the heart of man, the things which God hath prepared for them that love him.”

Brothers and sisters, the most powerful Being in the universe is the Father of your spirit. He knows you. He loves you with a perfect love." 

You can read the whole article here by Dieter F. Uchtdorf : You Matter To Him

I hope you will focus on being the best you, and look to find your own special beauty.  We all have beauty.  A beauty that cannot be seen on the outside, but only on the heart.  Look there to find the very best, brightest and most beautiful you.  Look hard, reach inside, grab careful hold of it, and act upon that beauty (even if it only starts out with a spark or two)!
My warmest regards to you in your quest to reveal and understand your true beauty. 
Christine 
To learn more about Jesus Christ and how he can help you feel greater joy, peace, and happiness in your heart, please visit one of my favorite sites: http://mormon.org/beliefs/jesus-christ

Fireworks and promises of the future

Several months back, I was driving alone in my silent van. I thought to turn on the radio, and as I did the words to this, then unfamiliar to me, song played to the questions and concerns of my heart.

"You don't have to feel like a wasted space
You're original, cannot be replaced
If you only knew what the future holds
After a hurricane comes a rainbow"

I felt that it was not coincidence that I was hearing this message.  A message I can only count as one from Heaven.  You see, I generally stick to the oldies channel, Christian, Broadway, or Latin music channel!  So, being on a pop channel, isn't where you'll usually find me.  The message spoke deeply to my heart.  It reminded me, in that low moment, that I'm original, special, and unique.  I'm not just wasting space or time, and there are many wonderful promise of the future that with my effort and patience will be of great joy and peace.

Many of you may already know this song.  But, if you're like me about music, then let me share it with you.

"Firework" by Katy Perry

Do you ever feel like a plastic bag
Drifting through the wind, wanting to start again?
Do you ever feel, feel so paper thin
Like a house of cards, one blow from caving in?

Do you ever feel already buried deep six feet under?
Scream but no one seems to hear a thing
Do you know that there's still a chance for you 
'Cause there's a spark in you?

You just gotta ignite the light 
and let it shine
Just own the night 
like the 4th of July

'Cause, baby, you're a firework
Come on, show 'em what you're worth
Make 'em go "Oh, oh, oh"
As you shoot across the sky-y-y

Baby, you're a firework
Come on, let your colors burst
Make 'em go "Oh, oh, oh"
You're gonna leave 'em all in awe, awe, awe

You don't have to feel like a wasted space
You're original, cannot be replaced
If you only knew what the future holds
After a hurricane comes a rainbow

Maybe you reason why all the doors are closed
So you could open one that leads you to the perfect road
Like a lightning bolt, your heart will glow
And when it's time you'll know

You just gotta ignite the light and let it shine
Just own the night like the 4th of July

'Cause, baby, you're a firework
Come on, show 'em what you're worth
Make 'em go "Oh, oh, oh"
As you shoot across the sky-y-y

Baby, you're a firework
Come on, let your colors burst
Make 'em go "Oh, oh, oh"
You're gonna leave 'em all in awe, awe, awe

Boom, boom, boom
Even brighter than the moon, moon, moon
It's always been inside of you, you, you
And now it's time to let it through-ough-ough

'Cause, baby, you're a firework
Come on, show 'em what you're worth
Make 'em go "Oh, oh, oh"
As you shoot across the sky-y-y

Baby, you're a firework
Come on, let your colors burst
Make 'em go "Oh, oh, oh"
You're gonna leave 'em all in awe, awe, awe

Boom, boom, boom
Even brighter than the moon, moon, moon
Boom, boom, boom
Even brighter than the moon, moon, moon
===
If you're a bit unsure of your value, as I all too often am, then I hope you will take heart to know that the world needs you.  People around you need you.  Make a difference by shining in the darkness-- with hearts of kindness and hands of service.

The sun will rise, even after the darkest night.  The sun always rises!  Don't give up hope. 
Christine

My drive to the temple...or "Come Follow Me"

As I drove to the temple tonight I had a lot of concerns and questions weighing on my mind.  Prayerfully I asked Heavenly Father why certain things may occur, well knowing that it would be tremendously hard for my family. 

You see, I feel I understand a few of the future heartaches God is preparing and strengthening me for.  So why, then, I asked, should things in our current condition play out as they appear they are going to?   Immediately I heard into my thoughts I hear the words to a hymn: "Not only shall we emulate His course while in this earthly state But when we're freed from present cares, If

with our Lord we would be heirs."

Translated by me to mean, that in order to know my Savior, Jesus Christ, and become pure like him, I too must also walk, at times, the same lonely path that he walked.  I must experience pain and suffering, and by so doing I will be growing spiritually.  From the hardships of life I will be preparing for the glories and joys of eternity.  The trials of mortality will help me become more than anything I can possible imagine.  My limited words and my short-sided understanding can't even grasp it all, much less explain it well.

How true are these words found in the Bible (Mark 13:13)
And ye shall be hated (or perhaps translated at time as, lonely, made fun of, misunderstood) of all men for my name’s sake: but he that shall endure unto the end, the same shall be saved.

May we be able to keep our focus as we face heartaches that seem too hard for us to bear.  We can!  We can bear all things "through Christ which strengtheneth" us! (Philipians and 4:13)

Life is worth living. May you have the comfort of God in your hearts and minds.
Christine

If you would like to learn more about our beautiful temples.  Please visit this link.  They also have live chat to answer any questions you may have.
http://mormon.org/faq/topic/temples

My messages from God....Duty, Preparedness, Self-Improvement!

My husband and I (when my neck isn't hurting!:)

My children need a Mom!

Today, I've had a lot of neck pain.  In fact, I've never had whiplash, but I venture to guess it feels like my neck.  Which is spasm-ing, hurts to turn, and throbs to tilt forward.  Tonight I'm sleeping in a recliner chair, in hopes that restricted movement will help improve my condition.

Normally, with this kind of pain I'd stay in bed all day.  I intended to in fact. I could use it as an excuse to rest and watch movies and be waited upon!  But, as I knelt in my morning prayer (and trust me, I considered using my neck as an excuse not to kneel, but decided God would see through the transparency of my soul if I did that, because he'd know it was my desire to be lazy) I heard words to a hymn, "you can not bid the sunshine to lengthen out its stay.  Improve the shining moments. Work while the sun is radiant;Work, for the night draws nigh."  (See complete words here at the music site that I get them :)

My son spraying the sprinkler at the back window.

Because of that hymn, and other considerations for the future I am trying to prepare myself and my children for, I decided I would work.  Even if it was slow and trudging...and yes, perhaps a little begrudging, I worked all day.  It was a slow day of sorting, separating, folding, tossing trash, etc... but, in the end I felt like I had something to be proud of---even though it was just a very small success in the scheme of things.

My two crazy "SUPER Hero" boys leaping
from my bed to my recliner!

I heard a few other hymns today.  Another hymn came, as I looked off my back deck into my backyard.  I felt upset and overwhelmed that despite work my husband and I had recently done to clean up our yard, and send things to the dump, that it was now cluttered and littered from our younger children in their summertime adventures.  I discovered where my missing measuring cups had gone to, as well as my mop bucket, broom,  and many other objects that belonged inside my house!! And yet, there came the words of the hymn ringing into my ears:  "Victory, victory though him who redeemed.  Victory through Jesus Christ our Lord.And I knew with the help of God, I can change and improve in my life! (See the words to this hymn: "Behold! A Royal Army" here.)

Out of the four hymns that not-coincidentally played into my thoughts today (including
"Gently Raise the Sacred Strain" 

Little M playing the harmonica.

 and "Today, While the Sun Shines") three of them specifically are about duty, self-improvement and preparedness.  Do you think that maybe our loving heavenly Father is trying to teach me to improve my world, so that I can bless not just myself, but also my husband and children?!   I do!


Doctrine and Covenants 64:33
Wherefore, be not ^aweary in ^bwell-doing, for ye are laying the foundation of a great work. And out of ^csmall things proceedeth that which is great.

Alma 34:32-33
32 For behold, this ^alife is the time for men to ^bprepare to meet God; yea, behold the day of ^cthis life is the day for men to perform their ^dlabors.

 33 And now, as I said unto you before, as ye have had so many ^awitnesses, therefore, I beseech of you that ye do not ^bprocrastinate the day of your ^crepentance until the end; for after this day of life, which is given us to prepare for eternity, behold, if we do not improve our time while in this life, then cometh the ^dnight of ^edarkness wherein there can be no labor performed.

(read also 2 Timothy 2: 3, 22 and Isaiah 1:16-18) 

For the sake of my children and posterity, I must change for the better.  I hope you'll join me on this arduous, sometimes exhausting, but heavenly rewarding journey.   I know through the power of the atonement of Jesus Christ we can  do all things!

Christine

P.S.  Sorry, but none of my photos are edited today, so I realize they aren't as bright and colorful as usual. :P

How Can I Be A Better Mom?

We made homemade pasta on my daughter's 7th Birthday.

I'm really trying to make an effort to be a better Mom.  I feel like I've been making some poor choices.  I used to do scrap-booking, painting, making homemade play-dough making, nature walks, read picture books, etc. etc.  But after the first 2 children I slowed down on doing those things.  Now
my children watch too much television (T.V.)

If there's water, he'll find it!!! (Oxen trough)

It's especially gotten harder, since having my fourth child, because he came with some special
needs.  Mild, though they are, he struggles to stay at one task very long, and is sensory seeking.  From a young age he kept me busy cleaning up such messes as 50lb. bag of flour, 25 lbs. of rice, water floods, butter painting the floor, drinking hand sanitizer,  letting out all our rolling pigeons--which the dog caught and killed, and many other adventures of our precious, and very energetic son!

Instead of telling you my failures as a Mom, I'll tell you some of my success stories of late.  I mean, really, you don't want to hear the frustration I expressed at my 3 and 6 year old sons tonight, when I walked into my bathroom to discover they were painting their nails, wearing my costume wig hair piece, and spraying water all over the bathroom?! do you?!  :O

So, the other day, my 14 year old son, went on a pioneer trek with our stake. --For those of you who are not members of The Church of Jesus Christ of latter-day Saints, a stake represents a bunch of "wards" which is another way of saying the group of people you go to church with at your allotted time on Sundays.  I meet at 1pm.  Other wards--in my building-- meet at 9am and 11am.  This is repeated for the other LDS church building in our small area.  Combined all these buildings make a stake.  Clear as mud, right! :P
Anyhow.....  I decided last minute that perhaps I should make sure he was properly packed up for trek!  I ended up staying up sewing his costume and finding odds and ends, until 4:30am!!  Nope, I'm not the most prepared Mom, but I put my mind to it, and did it. 

Although I was really tired after sending him off to camp, I still wanted to go swimming that afternoon with my husband, and remaining four children (ages 3, 6, 8, 12).  I took about an hour nap, and prayed for the energy to go and be a Mom.  Even though I was only going on about 3 1/2 hours of sleep.  I was blessed with the stamina to get up from my bed, and push myself to the pool at my Aunt's apartments.

Once there, I decided I'd rather just sit back and read a good book.  But in the back of my head, I knew that my real goal and desire was to be a better Mom.  It was at this moment that I asked myself what my goals in life are.  One of those goals is to give my children focused time--with no distractions.  Meaning no computer, tv. housework, reading, etc.  So, I chose the harder but more satisfying path that leads me to becoming a better Christian.  I got up off my rear end and walked over to the pool.


Now you should know something about me....ummmm,.....well,....okay this is embarrassing to say (just add it to my list of quirks) but I don't love the initial feeling of getting wet.  Once I'm wet, I'm fine...but the wanting to put myself into the path of water (especially if it's not pleasantly warm water) is not my favorite thing to do.  Now I knew full well that my aunt's pool tended to have cold water, and that caused me to feel all the more apprehensive!

I walked to the deep end, and told my children to count to 3, and I would dive it.  Oh, did they like that. 1! 2! 3! I dove into the chilly water (on an overcast day) and came up colder than ever.  My first response was to get out, dry out, and stay out.  But, I remembered my goal to be a better Mom, and I persevered.  I began doing laps (As I've always been a very good swimmer. I was even known as "the fish" when I was a little girl.)  It took a few minutes, but I was soon comfortable warm in the water.

I then went and took turns bringing each of my 3 youngest children into the deep end.    They all have apprehension about water, and initially with each of them there was a lot of screaming and flailing.  Once they realized they could trust me not to do anything without their approval, they began to calm down.  I didn't make sudden moves, dunk them, throw them around, or splash.  Soon, after each turn with my children there were very clear changes in their attitude.  They each wanted time with Mom. 

She's been improving.  Not wanting ears wet,
but she'll get her face wet.

In fact, my 8 year old has some sensory issues, and has been unable to get baptized yet (which most children do at the age of 8 in The Church of Jesus Chris of Latter-day Saints).  She doesn't like waters in her ears or on her face.  She was the most tense when I took her into the deep end.  She has never strayed past the stairs of the shallow end.  I carefully and lovingly worked in the water with her.

1. First she hugged me uncomfortably tightly around my neck and I taught her how to kick.  
2. After a while doing that, I was able to get her to loosen her grip and just hold her hands on my shoulder, while I held her up by her waist, and she practiced kicking.  
3. From there I helped her progress into turning her whole body away from me--  Now she had her back to my front side, and she was practicing kicking and paddling. 
4. By the end of her turn, she was so comfortable, that she let me hold her at my side, while she practiced kicking and holding the kick board in front of her. 

Look at my girl now!!

Too many of you these may not seem like a big
deal, but to a child on the autism spectrum, these are momentous moments.  And I am fully aware that if I'd kept doing things as I have in the past, I'd have kept getting the same results.  We've gone swimming since, and she continues to grow in her enjoyment of the water (as have my little boys:).  She has a ways to go, before she'll let me float her on her back (which requires getting her ears wet), but it's exciting to know that she's made progress, because as parent I cared enough to step out of my comfort zone.

I hope that you will look at the way you are raising your children, and find ways to make improvements.  As with my little girl, you may just make small steps of progression, but a step forward is always better than a step backward.







Pray that God will help teach you what you need to know to improve.  He wants each of us to "bloom where (we) are planted!"

Christine

Answers to prayer

If we listen, and seek to know God's will through prayer and scripture, and righteous actions, we will have His comfort and direction.  The amazing thing is that He speaks to us in the way we each understand. 

 Often I will have a song come into my thoughts (because I'm very musical), and it's usually very quietly done, so I usually sit, kneel, or stand very still (usually closing my eyes) and pray to know what the song is.  Other times it may be a few words, a concept I had never considered, a scripture, or even a memory of something I had been told by a family member, read in a book, or heard on the radio.  I've learned it continues to take me a lot of practice and prayer, and even still I sometimes miss those heavenly message, because I wasn't willing to stop and listen in my haste or worry.

In (the Bible) book of James 1:5 it reads
5 If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him.

I know the truth of this!  Tonight, as I knelt in prayer expressing my concern about getting certain matters in my life in order,  I became aware that over my words I was hearing a melody.  It was faint and first, and I struggled to identify it.  So I held still, set aside the things I was praying about, and

prayed to know what the song was.  And then the words came to my memory from a song I learned more than 20 years ago...

"If there be trials Lord to help me grown.  If Thou wilt guide me I will conquer this I know.  I will go and do the things which the Lord commandeth.  For I know that he giveth no commands to His children, except he prepare a way.  Except he prepare a way."





And I took comfort from those words of a Janice Kapp Perry song for my high school years (A Missionary's Pray [I will go, I will do]).  I knew I will be taken care of by him, as I keep my heart reaching upward. (full words at this link: http://www.lds.org/new-era/1984/03/a-missionarys-prayer-i-will-go-and-do)

I hope and pray that each of us will care more about God's will for our life, than our own personals wills and agendas. 

I also hope you know I am not even remotely proclaiming perfection, nor trying to brag.  It's just that my heart has become less selfish about me, and a lot more interested in God.  And I feel so much more love in my heart for Him, and those around me.

I have a long way to go though.  Trust me when I say this!  While it's true I've become nicer in many ways, because of my efforts, but
I'm still much too difficult and ornery. :(  The neat thing is that I have hope through Jesus Christ and His saving atonement that I can become better through Him.  AND SO CAN YOU!  Heavenly Father wants us to be happy, but it takes effort, diligence, and consistency on our part.

Come to Jesus by Kenneth Cope

This song is absolutely beautiful.  I hope you will listen. (p.s. My husband is in this video as a shepherd too!)

Here are a few of the words.  I'll try to put the rest up tomorrow.

"When the love spills over
and music fills the night,
and you can't contain your joy inside,
then dance for Jesus, and live!"
"With your final heartbeat
kiss your world goodbye. 
Go in peace and laugh on glories side,
and fly to Jesus and live!"
Christine