Day 1 of 365 days of sorrow

UPDATE: I just added the bread recipe I made with my children yesterday. It is a delicious! I have also added some photos of our making bread together. Until today though, I didn't realize that I was figuratively giving my children manna.

I didn't recognize it yesterday, but now I really don't think it was coincidence that my 8 year old son, could be urged to come home from dinner, by asking if we would make pizza. I agreed, and he decided to come home willingly! (That's a first for him!) I haven't made homemade bread in a VERY long time, and on the day that I was directed toward a talk about daily bread, I realize it was just another reminder of Heavenly Father's care for me.
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I guess I'm back to blogging more regularly, because I need somewhere to keep track of my sorrowing journey, which began at a private, but very personally devastating experience yesterday.

I cannot speak about why I feel myself moving into a depression, because of the nature of things- but I can write about what I'm going to do to pick myself up and move forward again.  I know this journey is not something I can do on my own. I need the help of God and His angels!

My first step to overcoming the depression that is setting in upon my peace is to "knock."  That

means I'm going to do my part to be diligent in things of God, every day of my life! I need His help, and by knocking, the door and way will be opened unto me. Oh, I need that door opened! (But I will keep a prayer of patience, so I can have patience in His timetable and not my own.)

29 Therefore, ask, and ye shall receive; knock, and it shall be opened unto you; for he that asketh, receiveth; and unto him that knocketh, it shall be opened.
3 Nephi 27:29

Living a Godly life, means to
follow the recipe for success that Christ taught!

To me, "knocking" means to seek the help of Heavenly Father (God) through prayer and scriptures study.  I am also very careful about my media choices.I try to choose things that God would approve of- and that doesn't include things that involve extreme violence, or immorality.

But there has to be more.  For me it means that I make sure I am listening to encouraging talks and speeches, and walking in the sunshine (which is a very exciting event- given that I have lived in a place that see's very little sunshine during the winter!), and doing unselfish acts of service for others.

I go to school, online, but I still went on a little walk tonight, and I also made homemade pizza with my children.  They enjoyed that very much.  It was also delicious.  Maybe I'll come back with that recipe later. (See RECIPE further down)

As I looked out on the beautiful orange setting sun over the farm field behind my home, I felt thankful that the sun was still shining, even if in my heart I felt dark storm clouds on the horizon.  As I listened to a talk about Manna, I realized that I was going to have a season, where I relied completely on Heavenly Father, and the manna he could provide to help me get through each day.  I also learned that I can make it through a day, or maybe sometimes only an hour...but that I can make it through, even if it's just small bite sized pieces! I will not quit, because I know that through Jesus Christ, who overcame all things, I can get through this!

Here are some longer, but encouraging words I took solace from... I listened to his video-- I'd recommend it all! 

"You will remember the great exodus of the tribes of Israel from Egypt and the 40 years in the wilderness before entering their promised land. This massive host of well over a million people had to be fed. Certainly that number in one location could not long subsist on hunting game, and their seminomadic lifestyle at the time was not conducive to raising crops or livestock in any sufficient quantity. Jehovah solved the challenge by miraculously providing their daily bread from heaven—manna. 

This small edible substance which appeared on the ground each morning was something quite new and unknown. The name manna, in fact, was derived from words meaning “What is it?” Through Moses, the Lord instructed the people to gather enough each day for that day, except on the day before the Sabbath, when they were to gather enough for two days. 

At the beginning, despite Moses’s specific instructions, some tried to gather more than enough for one day and store the balance: 

And Moses said, Let no man leave of it till the morning. 

Notwithstanding they hearkened not unto Moses; but some of them left of it until the morning, and it bred worms, and stank.[Exodus 16:19–20] 

As promised, however, when they gathered twice the normal daily quantity of manna on the sixth day, it did not spoil: 

And they laid it up till the morning, as Moses bade: and it did not stink, neither was there any worm therein. 

And Moses said, Eat that to day; for to day is a sabbath unto the Lord: to day ye shall not find it in the field. 

Six days ye shall gather it; but on the seventh day, which is the sabbath, in it there shall be none. [Exodus 16:24–26] 

Again, however, some could not believe without seeing, and they went looking to gather manna on the Sabbath. 

And the Lord said unto Moses, How long refuse ye to keep my commandments and my laws? 

See, for that the Lord hath given you the sabbath, therefore he giveth you on the sixth day the bread of two days; abide ye every man in his place, let no man go out of his place on the seventh day.[Exodus 16:28–29] 

It seems that even in ancient times, as today, there were some people who couldn’t resist shopping on the Sabbath. 

By providing a daily sustenance, one day at a time, Jehovah was trying to teach faith to a nation that over a period of some 400 years had lost much of the faith of their fathers. He was teaching them to trust Him, to “look unto [Him] in every thought; doubt not, fear not” (D&C 6:36). He was providing enough for one day at a time. Except for the sixth day, they could not store manna for use in any succeeding day or days. In essence, the children of Israel had to walk with Him today and trust that He would grant a sufficient amount of food for the next day on the next day, and so on. In that way He could never be too far from their minds and hearts. 

We should note, by the way, that 40 years of manna was not meant to become a dole. Once the tribes of Israel were in a position to provide for themselves, they were required to do so. After they had crossed the Jordan River and were prepared to begin their conquest of Canaan, beginning at Jericho, the scripture records that
they did eat of the old corn of the land [that is, the previous year’s harvest] on the morrow after the passover. . . . 

And the manna ceased on the morrow after they had eaten of the old corn of the land; neither had the children of Israel manna any more; but they did eat of the fruit of the land of Canaan that year.[Joshua 5:11–12] 

Likewise, as we plead with God for our daily bread—for help in the moment that we

cannot ourselves provide—we must still be active in doing and providing that which is within our power. 

There were times when I had exhausted all my resources, when I had nowhere or no one to turn to at that moment, when there was simply no other human being I could call on to help meet the exigency before me. With no other recourse, more than once I fell down before my Heavenly Father begging in tears for His help. And He did help. Sometimes it was nothing more than a sense of peace, a feeling of assurance that things would work out. I might not see how or what the path would be, but He gave me to know that, directly or indirectly, He would open a way. Circumstances might change, a new and helpful idea might come to mind, some unanticipated income or other resource might appear at just the right time. Somehow there was a resolution.

Though I suffered then, as I look back now, I am grateful that there was not a quick solution to my problem. The fact that I was forced to turn to God for help almost daily over an extended period of years taught me truly how to pray and get answers to prayer and taught me in a very practical way to have faith in God. I came to know my Savior and my Heavenly Father in a way and to a degree that might not have happened otherwise or that might have taken me much longer to achieve. I learned that daily bread is a precious commodity. I learned that manna today can be as real as the physical manna of biblical history. I learned to trust in the Lord with all my heart. I learned to walk with Him day by day.

I was impressed by something a senior officer said to the group as they began the final and most demanding phase of their training. He said:

“First of all, I do not want you to give in to the pressure of the moment. Whenever you’re hurting bad, just hang in there. Finish the day. Then, if you’re still feeling bad, think about it long and hard before you decide to quit. Second, take it one day at a time. One [phase] at a time 

“Don’t let your thoughts run away with you, don’t start planning to bail out because you’re worried about the future and how much you can take. Don’t look ahead to the pain. Just get through the day, and there’s a wonderful career ahead of you.” 

Generally it is good to try to anticipate what is coming and prepare to deal with it. At times, however, this captain’s counsel is wise: “Take it one day at a time. . . . Don’t look ahead to the pain. Just get through the day.” To worry about what is or may be coming can be debilitating. It can paralyze us and make us quit.

In the 1950s my mother survived radical cancer surgery, but difficult as that was, the surgery was followed with dozens of painful radiation treatments in what would now be considered rather primitive medical conditions. She recalls that her mother taught her something during that time that has helped her ever since: 

I was so sick and weak, and I said to her one day, “Oh, Mother, I can’t stand having 16 more of those treatments.”

She said, “Can you go today?”
“Yes.”
“Well, honey, that’s all you have to do today.”
It has helped me many times when I remember to take one day or one thing at a time.

The Spirit can guide us when to look ahead and when we should just deal with this one day, with this one moment. If we ask, the Lord will let us know through the Holy Ghost when it may be appropriate for us to apply in our lives the commandment He gave His ancient Apostles: “Take therefore no thought for the morrow, for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself. Sufficient is the day unto the evil thereof” (3 Nephi 13:34; see also Matthew 6:34).

President Ezra Taft Benson, speaking of repentance, gave this counsel:

We must not lose hope. Hope is an anchor to the souls of men. Satan would have us cast away that anchor. In this way he can bring discouragement and surrender. But we must not lose hope. The Lord is pleased with every effort, even the tiny, daily ones in which we strive to be more like Him.

Today, I was blessed by his manna to hear beautiful songs into my thoughts...one of which were the words of a beloved hymn

"Be still, my soul: When change and tears are past,
All safe and blessed we shall meet at last."

I believe those words, and know that through Christ, I will be safe and blessed!

I have determined that I am going to essentially have a chain, which for each day of the next year I am going to tear off, until I arrive safely at a place of peace.  I hope it won't take that long, but I feel hopeful that if I have a goal to try a little each day, I will somehow beat the monster if depression and self-pity, which is trying to drown me in the moment. I will take it a day by day with the help of God, and I KNOW that He will help me.

I know that some of you will not be able to overcome depression, quite as I hope to, because I know there are many factors involved, but I am hopeful that I may still help any of you readers as you face a dark day, for which you'd rather sleep, than wake up and serve a family of 5 children- like I have! I will only be able to face each day, with the grace of God.

Well, sorry this is not a well ordered post, but I did want to go to bed!  I'm proud of myself for not going to bed at 7pm, to escape realitythrough sleep.  But it's 11:00 now and I am tired.

May you feel hope and help through heaven's help. Please join me on my quest, if you are just barely hanging on right- we can be happier- even if we still feel depressed.

Love, Christine

I survived day #1- I've got this!

P.S. Here is a picture of me yesterday, after things had happened which disrupted my peace.  Try as I might, I couldn't manage a smile for the picture.  I'm glad I can at least get myself to smile today.

Be the Children....

In my recent studies of the scriptures, I was interested to read references to our being like children:

"That ye may be the children of your Father who is in heaven..." 3 Nephi 12:45

I find it interesting that it doesn't say, "that ye may grow out of your childhood, into independent adults, or, worse yet, rebellious teenagers" but it instead references us as children.

I really like these two other references to children, though there are plenty more.

Moroni 8:17

"7 And I am filled with charity, which is everlasting love; wherefore, all children are alike unto me; wherefore, I love little children with a perfect love; and they are all alike and partakers of salvation."

"...become as a little child," (3 Nephi 11:37-38)

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What might we consider, and learn from in this simple line, "be the children" or "become as a little child"--  unrelated to specifically related scriptures?

Well, we could first ask; Whose children are we?  Answered, in reference, we clearly know, "I am a child of my 'Father who is in heaven.'"

Other questions I think of:

• Why should we be like children?
• Does God really want us to be like children?
• What are the qualities of children?
• Is there a difference of acting childish, versus acting like a child?
• Do I act like a childlike? Or do I act childish?

Definition of childlike: resembling or suggesting a child : like that of a child; especially : having or showing the pleasing qualities (such as innocence) that children often have 

:  resembling, suggesting, or appropriate to a child or childhood; especially :  marked by innocence, trust, and ingenuousness <childlike delight>

When you think of positive qualities of children, what do you think of?

Off the top of my head I think of most children as happy, trusting, loving, sweet, believing, admiring of beauty, curious, teachable, flexible, forgiving.

And then I ask myself. 

• Am I happy?
• Am I trusting?
• Am I loving?
• Am I sweet?
• Am I believing?
• Am I admiring of beauty?
• Am I curious?
• Am I teachable?
• Am I flexible?
• Am I forgiving?

You may ask, "Okay, so children usually are a soft, sweet, ball of love and goodness, with bright eyes, and open manner and expressiveness- what does that have to do with me, and the scriptures?"

It has everything to do with the scriptures. I really think he wants us to be like  children, all while maintaining the need to also be caregivers ourselves to our children, grand-children, peers, and anyone who comes across our path. I think he really wants us to learn to see the world again- through the eyes of a child!

I think that God, our Heavenly Father wants us to ask ourselves those questions regularly. I think he wants us to ask ourselves questions like this:

"If I have a Father in Heaven, what does that mean to me?"

"How can I ever be like a child?! I'm all grown up now, and I'm set in my ways. Not to mention, I'm made some big mistakes. I could never be like a children, can I?!"

Let's prayerfully explore some answers to those questions.

When you needed help growing up, who did you go to?

When you were hurt, who did you go to?

When you felt sad, sick, lonely, or tired, who did you go to?

I hope that you are able to think of someone, who cared for you. (Though, I sadly acknowledge that too

many of you may have had sad childhoods, I am not able to address that here.) I hope you can think of a Mother, Father, Grandmother or Grandfather, Sister, or Brother, who cared for you! 

I hope that you, my readers, felt safe, and cared for growing up-- with food to eat, a safe shelter, and warm, comfortable clothes to protect you.  Most of all, I hope you felt loved. Deeply, and truly loved, by the care of those over your protection.  When we consider the qualities of children and their relationship with their parents(or caregivers), we realized that they are dependent upon the direction and care of our Father or Mother. 

What I also find so interesting, is that as children, they are generally able to forgive quickly (Of course, I realize that for children with mental health issues, this is not always the case.  But, we will focus on the "norm" for now.) It doesn't seem to matter if the offending adult yelled, spanked, or removed their favorite toy- under normal, and fairly healthy living conditions children are generally able to forgive and move forward in that relationship- feeling safe. *(see note at bottom on the serious flip-side of this)

I think this is why references of being like "a  little child," or "be the children" of our Heavenly Father is a directive for us.  

When a child is in need, who do they go to for help? Generally speaking, a Mother, or Father, or someone else, who has taken on the parent role in their impressionable life. The child innately knows who to turn to for help and direction. Just as children generally seek out a caregiver, we also need to seek out our Heavenly Father.  

If we loved a little child dearly, and they got hurt, would we want them to not come to us for help, and instead just cry off in a corner somewhere?  What if they were so badly hurt, because of a choice they made- so serious an injury that they could die--would we want them to come to us, or would we tell them to just die, because it's their fault?! 

If we are mental healthy, we would never say that to a child or anyone, for that matter.  We'd say, "Oh, I'm so sad that you are hurt. Come to me, and let me help you."

I know how hard it is to comprehend a just and merciful, loving, all-knowing God. I especially know how hard it is to understand that a father could be so tender and loving with me.  But, I have come to understand that the nature of God, or Father, is far more loving than I can completely understand.  Heavenly Father loves us, and through the voice of His son, Jesus Christ, we know His feelings for us, 

"Come unto me, all ye that labor, and are heavy laden, 

and I will give you rest."  Matthew 11:28

It doesn't matter, who you are, or where you've been in this life-- we must become like the sweet little children, whose faces are bright with hope and love in their eyes, and in the works of their heart.  We must look longingly toward Savior, Jesus Christ, and toward our Father in Heaven, and then, and only then can our burdens of sin be washed clean through the atoning power of Jesus Christ.

We can repent! We are loved! We are children of a perfect Father. Unlike some father's and mothers, our God will never fail us- but we must reach out, and offer Him our hands and our lives to take us gently by the hand and lead us along.

If you don't know where to start, please leave a message, comment to me, or visit: www.mormons.org

Let us focus our energies on developing the qualities of those precious children around us, so that we may have the hearts and minds to be "young and heart!" Let us also strengthen the children, and ourselves, by praying daily, and being quick to love, and quick to find beauty.  

My blogpost, is not even remotely all encompassing, but I would encourage you to pray with all your heart for God, the Father to help guide your life, so that you can learn how to improve whatever situation you are in.  

We all have room to improve. 

We all have things to learn.  

We all need to learn to be flexible to change and to the will of our Father.  

We all have cuts and injuries (literal and figurative), which need to be healed.  

Through Heavenly Father's son, Jesus Christ- we have all the help we will ever need.  

As we each seek the Lord, and seek his help, he will lead us home to Him.  

I pray that our ours will be open to the needs of the children around us.  

I pray that we will see everyone through the eyes of a loving Father in Heaven. 

I pray we will bend our will, and our knees in prayer, that we will know of His will for us, INDIVIDUALLY! 

Psalms 71:2

Deliver me in thy righteousness, and cause me to escape: incline thine ear unto me, and save me.

God will listen to us, as we seek Him. If we incline (lean toward him) and listen, he will help us to overcome, and ultimately we will escape the dangers of this life- all through His power.

May you feel His love and joy upon your heart, as you seek to see the world through bright, and thankful eyes of a child.

Christine

A note about Abuse=======

* I understand what volatile, danger care givers can do to the life of a child.  The affects can be very damaging, and don't grow out of a person, just because they "grow up.  Harm for men, women, and children requires extra help. All children should be blessed to feel safe, and as caregivers, it is our God given duty to care for the spirit children, whom he has loaned us to care for and keep safe.  

I personally understand the harm that comes of abuse.  In children it leads to issues of insecurity and extreme levels of mistrust, which can last through adulthood. I know, because I was that child.  I didn't voice my fears at 7, but I knew where I felt safe- which was generally a dark closet, or a bush, or box. Here are some symptoms to look for in abused children (They didn't list things like hiding in dark closets, or never leaving a bedroom for hours or days on end, but I KNOW those are symptoms of a problem, because that's where I spent too many hours.)

http://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/child-abuse/basics/symptoms/CON-20033789

Please know that Heavenly Father works miracles, but He also expects us to leave situations that are dangerous to ourselves, and/or our children!  

I have seen God's miracles in my life, and He has helped me change my mind from a depressed unhappy person, to a happy, hopeful person- but it came at a price of sacrifice. I had to make a lot of changes, and reach out to health care professional, bishops, family, and friends, to help me learn how to make the changes that I needed to make, which were in direct relation to my childhood abuse.  

But whether you were abuse, or had a great childhood, and have just made some really bad choices- please understand--- No one,--

and I repeat NO ONE-- deserves to be abused in any form! It doesn't matter what you've done, or what you think you've done--  You are worth being treated right! 

There are counselors, and church clergy, community resources, family and friends, who can be a source of safety and starting a new life.  

IF YOU NEED IMMEDIATE HELP-- Open 24 HOURS--

Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline 

1(800-422-4453).

"If you're concerned that your child or another child has been abused, seek help immediately.

If the child needs immediate medical attention, call 911 or your local emergency number. Depending on the situation, contact the child's doctor, a local child protective agency, the police department, or a 24-hour hotline such as Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline (800-422-4453).

As an aside, I discovered this song yesterday, and I didn't quite understand what it meant. Now meaning to songs are often dependent upon our experiences and perspectives, but the message of this Mother, resonated deeply with me. I hope she stuck to her hard choice and did what was best for her children!  I will share the song, lyrics, and her interpretation.  

In high seas or in low seas
I'm gonna be your friend,
I'm gonna be your friend.
In high tide or in low tide,
I'll be by your side,
I'll be by your side.

(I heard her praying, praying, praying)
I said, I heard my mother,
She was praying (praying, praying, praying)
And the words that she said (the words that she said),
They still linger in my head (lingers in my head),
She said, "A child is born in this world,
He needs protection,
God, guide and protect us,
When we're wrong, please correct us.
(When we're wrong, correct us).
And stand by me. " yeah!

In high seas or in low seas,
I'm gonna be your friend,
He said, "I'm gonna be your friend."
And, baby, in high tide or low tide,
I'll be by your side,
I'll be by your side.

I said I heard my mother,
She was crying' (I heard her crying'), yeah! (crying', crying'),
And the tears that she she'd (the tears that she shed)
They still linger in my head (lingers in my head)

She said: "A child is born in this world,
He needs protection,
God, guide and protect us,
When we're wrong, (when we're wrong), correct us.

And in high seas or low seas,
I'm gonna be your friend,
I'm gonna be your friend.
Said, high tide or low tide,
I'll be by your side,
I'll be by your side.

(interpretation)

M. S. L.

Nov 27, 2014 at 6:09 am

I heard this song for the first time tonight! I've prayed cried and kept asking god to show me if I had done right. I made one of the hardest choices in life as a mother. Chose to put aside my common sense in order to stand closer to all that matters to me my children my "reasons". Raising two boys 9 and 3 alone, thank you Jah for once again speaking to me. No longer wondering now I am sure that protection and guidance to them is the best choice. Like you said I will trust you to be my guide. Guide me outta the place where lies caused pain where there was wrong restore all the Right! Continue to remain in me as I trust in you to get me thru and together we will win this fight! I stand alone but not without you, I give you they're lives as I remember these lyrics, I pray you keep them in my heart that I'd always know you'll continue to inspire me though I cry and struggle you will always be the best guide.

Ordinary Moments

I went to my local LDS Temple the other night. I enjoyed a very sweet, peaceful experience, which helped to ease the burdens of life. (To learn more about LDS Temples, or watch a short video, please visit: https://discover.mormon.org/en-us/topics/temples/?play=hero) 

As I went to leave a special area in this beautiful temple of God, I smiled goodnight to the sister, who held the door for me. I had a thought to thank her for her service at the temple, but I did not. 

As I went to descend the stairs to the lockers and change out of my white clothing, I thought about how I wanted to do what Heavenly Father wants me to do, above my own discomfort. I turned myself back around, opened the door to the room, which I’d just left, and told this sister (whom I have never seen before) "Thank you for your service at the temple. Then we hugged, and said goodnight.  =

This time as I began down the stairs, I felt thankful that I had followed that impression. It wasn't a big thing that I'd done.  I'm not even sure it made much of a difference to the sister. But it made a difference to me, because I had stretched myself out of my comfort zone.  And more importantly, I realized that the words of appreciation were really mine.

While the sister may not have realized it, I had the witness that those are the words Heavenly Father wanted me to speak to her. And while my words weren't all that impressive in scale, I felt the magnitude of understanding that I had spoken in those moments with a portion of his voice and love. That was a sweet feeling for me to know that I could be part of speaking kind words for Him. 

When I arrived to the locker room, and took notice that it was 10:40 pm! I'd never stayed that late in the temple, because that last session is completely done by 10 pm.  But the 8:15 pm session that I was part of, did have to wait for the 8 pm session to finish, before we could move forward through the temple session.  

In the locker room, I also took notice that there were sisters dressed in all white work uniforms. These sisters stood around visiting happily among themselves by our lockers, as they waited for us from the last session to leave, so they could begin cleaning the temple (which they do each night).  I smiled to myself, and wondered what a blessing it would be to clean the house of the Lord.

After changing into the dress I’d worn in, I made my way through the inner lobby.  I saw more workers in white. This time it was the men, standing around visiting pleasantly, as they waited for the patrons (me and the other non-workers) to leave.  Again, I smiled as I considered the privilege of this literal temple work, which they and the others accomplish.  

As I rounded the corner to make my way into the main, outer lobby of the temple, I saw two college age men sitting on the nearby chairs.  I smiled at them both, but the facial expression of one dark haired young man, who was leaning forward with his arms on his legs and his hands gripped together, just passed his knee.  I can't explain it, but there was either an expression or spiritual insight, I'm not sure which- but I seemed to sense a dissatisfaction with his temple job. 

I had the thought to not only smile at these young men, but to also thank them for the service they render in the temple, and expressed how much I, and others, appreciate what they do. But, as I thought that, I also felt doubt about speaking.  "I don't know them, and besides, do I really feel

thankful for what they do?" And with that embarrassed thinking, I continued on through the wooden exit partition into to the main lobby, and then out the temple doors. 

I kept thinking I should go back, and thank them for helping keep this beautiful temple clean. I even thought, once outside, that I could hurry back in and thank them.  But I'm sorry to say that I justified myself to believe that would be too embarrassing, and hence, I let myself walk on without expressing a voice of appreciation. 

I felt badly that I had withheld my small voice, which might have brightened the heart of that young man. As I walked through that cold, dark night to my van, I expressed my apologies to Heavenly Father. I told him that I wasn't sure if I should have said anything, but that I think I should have.  And I asked his forgiveness that I didn't speak where I could have.  I asked if He would please take that sick feeling of regret from me, and help me to learn from that experience.  My peace did not come immediately, but it did come, as I prayerfully recommitted myself to not withholding the kind words I have to speak. 

You are probably thinking to yourselves that I was "overthinking" it.  But I am not so sure. I can't help but recall, "where much is given, much is required. (JST, Luke 12:57)I had a keen sense in that moment, as I do even now, that I am called unofficially to be a steward of Heavenly Father's words of love, and actions, to others.  

When I fail to speak or do things, which might have consoled or brightened the life of others, I have an awareness of my accountability to God.  I further know, that if I fail to heed impression too often, those impressions are going to stop coming to me.

Thankfully, I know that Heavenly Father is merciful and forgiving when I fail to speak and act in love, but hopefully I allow those moments of my shortcoming to help teach and remind me to improve, and "scatter sunshine all along the way."(see video)

As I read in The Book of Mormon (another testament of Christ) I learned a great deal from chapter 10, but I was particularly impressed with the words I read in Helaman 10:4-5 (Request you free copy of The Book of Mormon- https://www.mormon.org/free-book-of-mormon:)

4 Blessed art thou, Nephi, for those things which thou hast done; for I have beheld how thou hast with unwearyingness declared the word, which I have given unto thee, unto this people. And thou hast not feared them, and hast not sought thine own life, but hast sought my will, and to keep my commandments.

5 And now, because thou hast done this with such unwearyingness, behold, I will bless thee forever; and I will make thee mighty in word and in deed, in faith and in works; yea, even that all things shall be done unto thee according to thy word, for thou shalt not ask that which is contrary to my will.

I am not a prophet, called to officially "declare the word," but that does not mean that Lord wants me to keep silent. Nor does it mean that there aren't specific things which He will direct me to speak or act upon-even in my small sphere of influence. I feel strongly that as disciples of Christ, we are called to bear testimony to the truth, wherever we may stand.  

I believe that as we are unwearing (tireless) in our efforts righteousness, we will also see an increase of blessings, and that we too shall be made "mighty in word and in deed, in faith, and in works."` I believe these blessings will unfold as we seek to align our will to His in all things.  

May we live worthy of the Spirit of God.

May we always have a prayer in our heart, that we will know what words He would have us speak.

May prove our faithful in the cause of righteousness; that our hands will be clean before the Lord, and meekly act in purity and holiness of heart.

That is my prayer for you,

Christine